How to navigate Christmas 🎄

Whatever meaning Christmas has for you, the festive season can be tricky to navigate, even when there’s lots to look forward to. 

Here are some thoughts on how to navigate Christmas on your own (merry) terms.

Tradition

Ideas of what Christmas should look like and what we should be feeling are everywhere; whether it’s advertising, music, or social expectations for this time of year. 

Some of these expectations fall into the category of ‘should do’, ‘ought to’, ‘have to’, or even ‘get through’,and it’s important to give ourselves a moment to check in with what feels good, and what feels like it’s not really serving us anymore. 

It can be helpful to ask ‘what version of this would feel comfortable and bring me joy?’ as well as ‘‘what feels realistic?’ when it comes to the money, resources, and time available.

Just because something has always happened in a particular way, it doesn’t mean it has to stay the same. Traditions and expectations can be let go of, renegotiated with, or can be recreated entirely to reflect what is important now or what needs to be prioritised.

Family

No one has the perfect family.  

The pressure to create a harmonious and happy Christmas Day may feel possible for some, but for others, it can seem unachievable for lots of valid reasons.

It can be liberating to remember that you can be with the people that make you feel understood, cared for, and loved; whether that is your relatives or a chosen family that you’ve formed (or both!)

Loneliness and loss

The end of year transition and the social expectations of Christmas can exacerbate feelings of loneliness, and the sense of what has been lost. 

This time of year can also bring up feelings of grief around what we’ve hoped for or needed, and not received. 

It’s important to respond to these feelings with tenderness and compassion, so that you can actively be kind to yourself and prioritise the things that sustain you and bring you joy. (More discussion of looking after yourself in the colder months can be found here).

Your worth and wellbeing must start with you, and accepting and recognising these feelings can provide opportunities to reflect on and identify what you need the most. This process can support you to decide how to offer this to yourself in ways that are sustainable and reflective of who you are.